Friday, March 12, 2010

Let Us Prey

As your kids get older you brace yourself for the larger questions in life. We've already had adventures with sex, sexuality and reproduction. Obviously Lucy appearing 'out of Mom's butt' was one area of intense discussion. Then there was the time that she made a grab for LK's distinctly male anatomy as he exited the shower. 'Dada's not comfortable with that!' was his hasty reply.

I'm with Atticus Finch on the issue of kids questions. Be truthful, and succinct. They know when you're covering something up. Especially if it's a penis.

It turns out though that you can still dodge some pretty big bullets if you're lucky enough and your kid is on the naive side of 5.

LK and I were watching 007 the other night and Anna came downstairs for a glass of water.

"What's this? Is this a Dada movie? Can I watch it?"
"No, it's not for kids. It's James Bond"
"James Barn? About animals?"
"Err, not really"
"Why can't I watch it"
"It's got scenes we don't want you to see"
"Like what, like fighting?"
"Exactly"
"Oh, I get it like 'it's mine, no mine, mine, no mine!!'

Well, you tell me a better explanation of a James Bond plot.


We skirted an even bigger minefield with the following gem in the car as we were driving home from the park.

Anna "Mom, what does it mean to pray?"
Me: Crap! Be calm....errmm,
LK: Turns whilst driving, smiles and raises his eyebrows as if to say 'have at it hoss'
Anna: "And why don't we do it?"
Me: "Well" my mind was a swirling mass of 'belief systems' and 'faith' and 'personal choice' and then...
Anna: "Why do only dinosaurs do it?"
Me: "-------"
Anna:??
Me: WTF? "What?"
Anna: "My book says dinosaurs prey on smaller dinosaurs. What does that mean?"

Collective sigh of relief.......

7 comments:

FeatherDuster said...

I love coming here for a good giggle.

Yulee said...

After a few incidents similar to pray/prey, now I always ask my daughter to tell me the full sentence the word was used in.

Hyphen Mama said...

OMG!! I LOVE ANNA! That girl is a so darned smart!

Wynnie slings "Mommy, what is God?" at me during dinner. Really? Dinner time is too late in the day for that.

Muddling Along Mummy said...

Loving the James Bond synopsis!

aibee said...

Hilarious!

Lizz said...

that's definitely my cousin!

pvz said...

We're not quite to this point yet, but definitely getting close. Both with regards to sex/reproduction and praying/church. Our daughters are 2 and 4 and so far they "know" that babies are inside a mommy's stomach, and that they come out (somehow).

Their cousins go to church (in a southern state) and we'll be getting together with them this summer. I'm bracing for questions about church and Jesus and....

My current plan: turn to dinosaurs! As in, not only do they prey, but they also ate Jesus....