Thursday, February 07, 2008

Yoga For Juveniles

About once a week I go to a yoga class. Now, I'm about as supple as a plank of wood, which may be why LK is so keen on me going, but this class is mainly about de-stressing. It is a restorative yoga class, and these days I am finding it one of the only healthy ways to quiet the endless chatter in my head. This class works like a charm, and I sleep like the dead afterwards.

I started doing yoga when I was pregnant with Anna, under the impression that it might help me keep fit and strong whilst pregnant, and possibly even help with the birthing process.

HA!!

It did not help the birthing process. Apparently, my 'practice' had not quite reached the point where I could effectively breathe through open heart surgery.

I've continued with the yoga despite the intimidation factor of being one of the few people not to touch their noses to the floor during a forward fold. I used to think it was the baby bump hindering my forward fold. No, apparently I'm the tin man of yoga.

Sadly, birthing a whopping great 8lb 10oz baby has not made my yoga any easier, namely because for a long time I remained a little *loose* down there and found it quite hard not to fart. Basically, for many months after spitting out my little watermelon, trying to do a kegel exercise was like trying to wiggle my ears. There was simply nothing there. This has been a running joke between my stalwart yoga-partner RedFox and myself. So you can imagine our delight at overhearing this little gem:

Yogi: How are you ladies doing over here?

RedFox & Me: Ommmmm, ostentatious yoga breathing....

Yogi: And you, random yoga woman?

Random Yoga Woman, in reverent tones: Wonderful, I just experienced a big release.

8 comments:

Amy said...

though yoga i found yoga quite relaxing, i like to sweat to feel like i get a good workout. i never did with yoga. maybe i just wasn't doing it right!

Little Britainer said...

You may not be surprised by this, but yoga in England is COMPLETELY and UTTERLY different to yoga in America. There is definitely no talk of big releases, and if any are *heard*, heaven forbid, there is much blushing and moving on quickly.. And there's no omming or singing. I feel terribly uncomfortable in the American yoga classes I've been to, which isn't really conducive to nose-touching-mat positions either...

Expatmum said...

God ali, TMI, but funny. I am off to a yoga/pilates torture session with my friend. Ours is supposed to be tailored to us (ie. my dodgy knee and torn rotator cuff). As you can imagine, I can't do many of the moves but years of ballet at least makes me look like I can!

family affairs said...

Hello, expat mum suggested I pop in - I actually teach a form of yoga back in the UK, but sooo shouldn't be, I'm as far from calm yogi as you could get....I was writing about "mat rage" today - so enjoyed reading your views. I have actually had somebody fart in my face as I was helping them do a stretch - I think that I've written about that somewhere - yuk...

ExpatKat said...

Expatmum and I really do seem to be living the same lives! I too go to yoga/pilates which is doing wonders for all my bodily ailments (brought on by childbirth!)
Totally hilarious Ali, because it's so true. Being the 'Brit-in-the-class', I do my utmost to contain myself and have been suitable shocked by the 'release' shown by some of my American counterparts. It is probably not condusive to true karma on my part, but saves my blushes.
PS. Small tip - don't eat a curry the night before!

Sugarplum's Mom said...

Oh I used to go to a Yoga class with a friend of mine. Loved it. Loved the instructor. She was really casual - no ohming or singing, but nice and challenging. Until I took the class I thought it was just fancy stretching.

Summerland girl said...

This was so funny! I enjoyed all of these comments as well!

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