Arse Over Tea Kettle

They've have some pretty bad weather in the UK recently, which usually means a particularly persistent drizzle, or that it's both raining and blowy, so you can't use an umbrella. Not so last week, Britain had xtreme weather, and Britain as you probably know, never has xtreme anything. It was so bad that my brother's girlfriend was literally blown off her feet, going arse over tea kettle as he put it, landing on her head. She had to be taken to the hospital because of a bad gash poor thing. My brother says she's 'alright in herself' now, lying on the couch nursing endless cups of tea - because that's what us Brits do in a crisis, and she's trying not to ooze on the armrest.

My brother's girlfriends have all followed a bit of a trend recently though, and this just underlines it for me. There was a time when he would go for anything with a beaver and a pulse - his favourite pick-up line being 'grab your coat love you've pulled', but he's since pared it down a bit to 6ft skinny blondes. His present girlfriend, who we all think is the dogs bollocks - that's good by the way - is no exception. She's very tall, very blonde and very skinny. So to me it was no surprise that she was blown over, xtreme weather or not.

My first thought was, that girl needs to eat more pies.